Between the light and me there is a blue uncertainty, passing tendrils of darkness and the sharp black shadows on the smoky lawn, the golden lampshade and nightshade of caramel-colored hardwood floors, a silent servant made of shadows sweeping up your heart one more time, one more night, another night, nights like this one, the stark madness of stinging all those around you before they sting you, a vicious orange barb, a puncture wound that bubbles up potent green poison.