Everyone loves beauty but it can be frightening. Rain drops on the asphalt make all the little diamonds and galaxies in there glitter and shine brighter. Almost no one notices it, you pass it by almost every single day, and it points meekly at its heart, a heart stem cocooned within the little black blooms of flowers that no one wants.
God's immense mercy, kiss me on the closed eyes. I wish I could sleep, I wish I felt better, I wish people didn't pass away or leave me. I wish I weren't lonely, I wish I didn't have this unbearable headache and wordless sadness. I wish I didn't have this sickness. A remote sadness and black disease from some desolate place that is mute, a dead place that I don't know. I cannot speak. I will not speak. I wish I could speak. A speakless sadness. Like a morning where you wake up and the entire world is dead. It kills me. It really kills me. It hurts. Everything I ever loved is gone.I am unbearably unhappy.